How do you win the Nobel Prize in just 12 days? Well, according to political pundit, columnist, and blogger Tommy De Seno over the last decade, the only discernible requirement has been to be "critical of George W. Bush--see Al Gore, Mohamed El Baradei, and Jimmy Carter."
But, even by that standard, Barack Obama's giddy cheerleaders in Oslo have broken new ground. The deadline for the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize nominations was February 1. The president took office just 12 days before that--on January 20.
So, what did the Celebrity-in-Chief do in those first 12 days in the White House? What did he do to deserve the accolades of the Nobel Committee? According to his own published White House schedule, he essentially threw some parties, skipped church, threw some more parties, had a few meetings with his staffers, made a couple of speeches, skipped church again, ordered the release of federal funding in order to export America's abortion holocaust to the rest of the world, threw some more parties, and watched the Super Bowl.
No really. That's about it. And for that, he won the Nobel Peace Prize.
Here's how De Seno recounts this prize-winning record:
January 20: Sworn in as president. Went to a parade. Partied.
January 21: Asked bureaucrats to re-write guidelines for information requests. Held an “open house” party at the White House.
January 22: Signed Executive Orders: Executive Branch workers to take ethics pledge; re-affirmed Army Field Manual techniques for interrogations; expressed desire to close Gitmo (how’s that working out?)
January 23: Ordered the release of federal funding to pay for abortions in foreign countries. Lunch with Joe Biden; met with Tim Geithner.
January 24: Budget meeting with economic team.
January 25: Skipped church.
January 26: Gave speech about jobs and energy. Met with Hillary Clinton. Attended Geithner's swearing in ceremony.
January 27: Met with Republicans. Spoke at a clock tower in Ohio.
January 28: Economic meetings in the morning, met with Defense secretary in the afternoon.
January 29: Signed Ledbetter Bill overturning Supreme Court decision on lawsuits over wages. Party in the State Room. Met with Biden.
January 30: Met economic advisers. Gave speech on Middle Class Working Families Task Force. Met with senior enlisted military officials.
January 31: Took the day off.
February 1: Skipped church. Threw a Super Bowl party.
So there you have it. The short path to the Nobel Peace Prize: Party, go to meetings, skip church, release federal funding to pay for abortions in foreign countries, party some more.
To which De Seno simply adds: "Good grief."
It looks like we've all just won the Nobel Booby Prize.